I Wish That I Could Have This Moment For Life

I feel young and carefree again, something that I havent felt for a long time;

Naj, Irah, Wani

:)

p/s : Manukan Island, 30th May 2011

I Miss,

p/s : gambar xmengekot turutan.

Hal Merajuk

5-10 months in the relationship;

W : oh.
K : merajuk ke? hu.
W : huhu.. aah nak merajok..
K : sorry sayang.. jom kte jumpe.. nk pujuk sayang.. bagi adiah..

11-20 months in the relationship;

W : *membebel panjang*
K : huhu... I'm sorry.. what can I do to make it up to you..
W : *merajuk*
K :
W : xde pujuk pun.
K : yela2, sorry k..

after 21 months in the relationship

W : Ok.
K : Knp? Nak majok ke?
W : Aah.
K : Oke..
W : Xkisah ke?
K : Asek nak majok je..

DAH.

Without You

In this 4 months of working I've been;

-working my ass off day and night just to get stomach ulcer (after that, learnt my lesson, reserve nighttime only for myself not work)

-having problems with my subordinates which led to their dismissals

What I can comment on working in the managerial level : DIFFICULT

I am better at handling and organizing stuff rather than organizing people. There are many kinds of people with many kinds of issues. But it is not professional for me to publicly blog further about the details of the story. So that's that.

p/s : Firing people is never pleasant but if the worker made him/herself a liability not an asset then we have to let them go, sekda jodoh orang kata.

Lovesick

when i miss you, i close my eyes and i can see that person better
i try to forget and erase, but i get reminded of that person more
i told myself a lie thinking that that person would come back
that person never said that he will be coming back, but all i can do is wait

the sin of loving that person a lot, the sin of loving you a lot
because of you, and because of sin, im sick of waiting
the sin of loving you more, the sin of missing you a lot
because of you, and because of sin, im crying with pain..like this

i told myself a lie thinking that that person would come back
that person never said that he will be coming back, but all i can do is wait

the sin of loving that person a lot, the sin of loving you a lot
because of you, and because of sin, im sick of waiting
the sin of loving you more, the sin of missing you a lot
because of you, and because of sin, im crying with pain..

breaking up is fast, but forgetting is hard
the love is painful, and i am hurt alone

p/s : rose, aku da addicted gak da..

Strangers, again.

Some will make it through, some will not. Let's just hope for the best, and try as hard as we can to make it through.

p/s : from Wong Fu Productions

Everywhere

Guess who came for a visit last weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!

Datang balik cpt2! I miss you.

p/s : dah berjanggut.

MC

You know you are already old when;

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel old

-you feel extremely tired and old

p/s : pointless. Hari ini saya cuti sakit yaw. But still have to do work at home.

Jesselton

p/s : foreveralone-blog.blogspot.com

Signature

I am sure all of us have changed our signatures from time to time. I was renewing my ATM pin the other day (because I forgot my ATM pin) and need to sign some forms. So I used my current signature but it was not accepted because my signature when I signed up for the account was different.

I mean, I was only 13 yrs old at that time. Apa2 pun, everything went well and I got a new ATM card. (After more than 4 months not being able to withdraw money from my account, Ha ha)

My signature when I was 13. (Not so accurate). But acceptable. When I was 13 I just signed however I want, and it must be a fancy one, which explains the curly style.


This, I am sure, my UTP friends are familiar with. I changed my signature because I need an easy signature, for my friends to sign the attendance list whenever I can't come to class. Hiks2.


This one is the most recent signature. Haha. I have to change my signature when I joined the working world, especially since I need to sign papers, docs, letters to government agencies and stuff. So I discarded the childish signature of my name and made a new one. Oh, another important thing is it must be easy to forge too, in case other staffs need me to sign any papers but I was not available.

p/s : Going back home next week. Can't wait!

TIGA.

Ya, saya ingin mengumumkan di sini... Kami telah berkahwin! Hahahahaha :P

Lelaki berbaju putih tu saya punya hero. Dia sgt hensem dan macho. Dia juga seorang yg penyayang dan sweet. Ramai perempuan terpikat kat dia. Tapi nasib baik dia xlayan sorg pun. (Kalo layan, siap!!) hik3...

Dalam tiga tahun kami bersama nie, dia mmg byk bersabar dgn kerenah saya and manja saya. Saya tahu saya byk kekurangan, tapi dia tak pernah guna kelemahan saya itu utk jadi alasan meninggalkan saya.

Saya sgt sayang hero saya.

Selamat ulangtahun kita yang ke-3 :)

Twenty5

Gila lamak xpost in here. My hands have been itching for weeks to write something, tho, but I havent got the time. So, thanks Anis for tagging me! :

"Once you have been tagged,you are suppose to write a note, with 25 random thing, fact, habits or goal about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tag you, it's because I want to know more about you. Your cooperation is highly appreciated."

1) I can't ride a bicycle. Trust me. Jgn gelak k!!!!

2) I am a sucker for good food. I spend so much money on good food. More than I spend on my clothes, accessories, bags and stuffs,

3) If I am really upset, my temperature will rise and my body will feel hot. So if you happen to touch me, and it feels like I'm running a fever when I don't look sick, it means I am upset.

4) If I am really upset, and on the verge of crying, I will feel more emotional if someone is very kind to me, and I will cry instantly. So, kalo aku tgh upset, biarkan je aku, nnt kalo pujuk aku makin upset and nangis.

5) I like the smell of the people that I adore, like my boyfriend, or my cat (ok, maybe my cat is not a person, but she's my baby)

6) I don't cry easily in front of people, even in front of my close friends. If I cry in front of you, it means that I am hurt, real baddd

7) I have been doubting my capability as a real engineer.

8) I have been upset a lot lately and it's because of my work.

9) When I get really nervous, the gastric will come and I will get really really sick (vomit)

10) I always try my best to be as punctual as I can. Because I believe that one of the attributes that can make you successful is punctual.

11) If do things in a rush, I will get dizzy. Like literally.

12 ) I am not a tidy person, nor am I selekeh. I am in between.

13) I never know how to dress as pretty as my friends.

14) I have this problem with my body, a big tummy, since God-knows-when.

15) And I also wish that I have a different physical appearance, more matured, not a child like appearance. This body is not really useful especially when you need to gain people's trust and respect when u are an engineer. Argh!! Not gemok tho.

16) I depend a lot on my dad, which I have to change and start living on my own.

17) My siblings are bigger than me, except for my 11 years old brother who is already almost the same height as me.

18) My mother is smaller than me, making her the smallest in the family.

19) I have lots of guy friends, but I only have one close guy friend, and one bestest guy friend.

20) I don't really open up to people even my close friends. I am scared of letting people down, and people letting me down.

21) I have this favourite bolster, that I have since I am 13 years old. I call it 'bantal busuk'.

22) I am not lady like. And I am not a tomboy. I am in between.

23) I get sleepy and comfy when someone play with my hair. But not everyone can touch my hairrr

24) I like fantasy books. Harry Potter, Twilight, etc. But not Lord of The Ring tho. Seriously boring. Chick lits are second.

25) I once used the land line to call my then boyfriend and friends. My parents have to pay app. Rm1k. Huehue.

____________________________________________________________________

It's been 5 weeks since I updated. I miss my classmates and my life in UTP already. Having read their blogs, I realized there's so much that I have been missing in these 5 weeks.

I am doing good, tho I constantly say that I have no money and no job, I actually have been helping my father with his IBS Trainings. And get a few hundred bucks from every training that I handled. Since this IBS Trainings can also be included in the construction category, I have been meeting all kinds of people from the construction world. The participants of the trainings are mostly contractors, or contractors wannabe or Civil engineering final year students, and most of them are older than me.

When I was a civil engineering student, I never fully understood how difficult it is being a female engineer. Having to face the prejudice and all. Esp when my physical appearance is like this. When I went for training in a construction company, my supervisor gave me this to answer "What are the obstacles of being a female engineer?"

I have no idea what to answer at that time. I only answered based on my logic.

But now, I am glad to give him a few pages of answer for this question.

I got a job in KK, Sabah, which will start this weekend. I am kinda nervous (not the sick and vomit level), that I am going there by my own, not having my father by my side and guide me like he did these past few weeks. I will basically do the same thing like I did here, plus managing the company. Planning to invite boyfriend to come to KK for a visit later on too.

I guess I will face the same thing too in KK, and I have to find away to make people see me as their trainer, or as their manager, not a fresh grad kid who earns nothing to be in that position.

I know this will be over after months of experience.

Chayo wani!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, before I forget;

Latihan Kemahiran Installer IBS
Light Weight Blockwork System
16-20 Januari 2011

Hehe.

p/s : This evening, I randomly asked the mobile shop man what age do I look like, and do I look like a kid to him. He said maybe. huh.

Note to self : Don't get to obsessed with this.

Distance

Nnt skype lagi. I miss you :)

Undefined

Let me illustrate to you how I thought my career path would be;

end of 2005

2007-2010


end of 2010.

So, one step at a time now, shall we?

p/s : no more school. What now?

You, you, you and you

I have a lot of catching up to do.

People have been leaving UTP one by one. Some I get to say goodbye for the last time, and some I did not. I am not good with words lately, so

Thank you so much;

to my housemates - Sal, Irene, Syuhada, Mype, Ned, Naj, Sher, Deng, Ina, Rin (not in the picture) and Enoi - for the fantastic year of sharing the house with you guys, you guys are seriously the most awesome housemates EVERRR

to Naj and Enoi, comrades, partners in crime for the past 5 years. I had the greatest time spent with you guys, gossiping, watching movies, take tons of pictures, not forgetting skipping classes and byk lagiklah. Thank you for making my life in UTP wonderful. Will miss you loads!


to Ned, my roommate, thank you for putting up with me and my 'temperaments' (esp my sarcasm, tho I dont mean it most of the time). haha.. and also for putting up with my staying up most nights making it hard for you to sleep with the lights on, but got used to it after sometime. Haha. Thank you Ned!!

to Weda, one of the most caring person I have ever met, thank you for being a great friend and a great confidante, rindu nak gossip2 ngn ko!!

to As, Siti, Nema and Pika (not in the picture) for the few last moments spent in West Malaysia (cey) as students. Had great times with you guys!! Nnt buat lg ye trip jalan2

to Rafi and Rose, for the double dates, couple things, hehe wont forget the times we spent together be it as couples or not, kawen nnt jgn lupe jemput :) dah2, jgn sdeh ye.. aku pun rindu korg gak nnt.. hahaha

to Aida, Edy, Husna, Dayah, Ada, Dya, Nad, Nana, Anis, Farha, Syara, Ami and Daa (not in the pictures) for the memorable times for the past 5 years us being classmates, and thank you too for the assignments you guys let me copy (haha), thank you so much!!


to Bali, my loyal chatting mate from 3rd year up until now. Tahan gak ko ye ngn perangai aku. haha.. Thanks bro. And also thanks for the free meals haha

and to others, whose name I havent mentioned yet, being in the same class with you guys was really the best :)


to Mr. Mubarak, my fyp daddy and Farha and Azim, my fyp brother and sister, thank you for your guidance for me to make it until the end. I cant thank you enough.


to Abg Johan and Abg Hafiz, thanks for your help and assistance for my final year project in the lab. You guys rock!


to Petronas (mana boleh lupa nie), my sponsor, thank you for the financial support, hehe


to my parents, two of the most important people in my life, thank you for the support you have given me all my life, you guys are the best and I will always make you proud of me, cant wait to see you!


and last but not least, to my dearie, cant thank you enough for all the things u have done for me, for saving me, for putting up with me, for loving me and byk lagi. I will miss you so much. Huhu....

You may see that I am a bit reluctant and haste in saying goodbye to you guys but it's not because I dont care, it's because I hate goodbyes esp when we will not see each other for a long time. Take care and keep in touch ya.

p/s : some of the pics I took from facebook profiles hope you dont mind :)

Careful

Michelle Featherstone - Careful

It's the little things
They pulled me in and I'm defenseless
I try to ignore like I've done before but it's just useless

I've made up my mind that I'm gonna let you in
And I'm not afraid but I have to say

This is gonna hurt if it ever ends
But somehow you have shattered my defense
This is gonna hurt if it ever starts
So promise you'll be careful with my heart

It's the things you do
They made me fall hard for you and I can't help it
And it's every day that I feel this way
So just don't stop it

I've made up my mind that I'm gonna let you in
And I'm not afraid but I have to say

This is gonna hurt if it ever ends
But somehow you have shattered my defense
This is gonna hurt if it ever starts
So promise you'll be careful with my heart

I won't make excuses
They just all seem useless
You don't have the time
I guess I'll take my chances now that I know love is on the line

This is gonna hurt if it ever ends
But somehow you have shattered my defense
This is gonna hurt if it ever starts
So promise you'll be careful with my heart

Careful with my heart

p/s : <3

Early Age

Alhamdulillah, achieved the first stage of self compacting concrete today.



p/s : Fikirkan boley!
p/p/s : Happy Birthday Muja :)
p/p/p/s : Get well soon Anis :)

Terkial-kial Macam Sial

Today is the shittiest day of my life because

-slept at 5am and woke up at 9am because were so nervous fearing that everything will go wrong again (and damn i was right) and i went straight to the lab although my head was literally up in the clouds

-wasted 5 hours for fyp which resulted into nothing
in fact, i wasted the whole semester for the goddamn project

-got mad at by boyfriend for no reason

-have to accept the fact that my fyp is doomed.

-there's only one thing left to do. which I despise the most. but I am desperate

and oh, my music player was randomly on travis - 'why does it always rain on me' while in the lab. ironic much?

p/s : kena buat solat hajat

ANGUISH

That, my friends, is me. And probably you, too.

p/s : Penat aku melukis guna power point. Esok ada test belom study pa2. Oklah

Puisi Sepi

Bisik ku pada bulan
Kembalikan temanku

Kekasihku, Syurgaku

Tanpa dia malam menemaniku
Sepi memelukku

Bulan jangan biar siang biar malam ini kelam
Biar ia sepi sepertiku

p/s : aicey...