the definition of life

simpang mangayau, kudat

last two nights i dreamt about my boyfriend leaving me and last night i dreamt about my friends back in my high school had forgotten about me.. i woke up with such horror that i cant stop thinking about everyone is really forgetting me and not remembering who is wani anymore.

i realized that one of the things that i scared the most is to be forgotten. being wani (duhh); i always push the thoughts aside and never failed to do that until i had those dreams. urgh. call it whatever u want, nightmares or anything i dont want to think about it anymore.

there's also one thing that i realized (a long time ago but managed not to think about it most of the times) is that im being pretty selfish right from the beginning. i only reply friends' messages or answer calls whenever i feel like it which is seldom to start with. and i deleted my friendster or whatever-ter account 2 years ago and ive lost contact with almost everyone. there's no one else to point fingers to but myself.

i guess i owe a few people some apologies (especially to you, faiz)

wew. thats weird. i dont usually admit my mistakes this easily. i guess the dreams really freaked me out.

one thing i dont like when i got back to kuching is i'll miss everyone more not to mention not seeing sayang. especially when my friends are not here in kuching.

and oh, ive figured out how to use facebook already. hahah